My "coming out" probably started while I was in high school, however, I didn't acknowledge this until much later in life. During the 50's you just didn't talk about these things.

In the late 80's I was faced with a delimma. My oldest son was dying of AIDS and I was taking care of him. As I was to discover later , while talking to a counselor, my son had told her he thought I was a lesbian. What a shock, even though I felt this was accurate I wasn't about to admit this to anyone, even myself.

One day after seeing to his needs and as he slept I was sitting in his room reading. His voice startled me . "Mom," he said, "I think you're a lesbian". That was the end of what he had to say and he went back to sleep. Several months later he slipped from this life to something better. My one regret is that at no time did we ever go back and discuss his feelings about me.

"Coming out" to my daughter was much different. I was at the home of my girlfriend when I received a phone call from my daughter. Her first question was, "Mom, are you a lesbian?" I asked her why she needed this information and what difference it made? Her reply was, "I don't care, you're my mom and I just want you to be honest with me."

The next person I needed to come out to was myself. This was much harder than I anticipated. I was accepted by family members and that was a relief so why not accept myself? Once I accepted myself as a lesbian and realized I was O.K. as a person my life seemed to take on a whole new meaning, I didn't have to be so careful. After all the people who mattered the most accepted me.